Mind/Spirit:
I haven't been blogging (or doing much of anything else) lately because of a gripping depression. I've been prone to depression my whole life (and due to a family history of mental illness and suicide I do take it seriously) but I've never been one to "cry" about it. Meaning quite literally that I hardly ever cry but also meaning that instead of dealing with it I tend to repress it way way down. This time is no different but in the past couple of weeks I think I've figured out the root of this onset. During my first few teenage years there was a certain sort of existence that I lived that I wasn't emotionally equipped to handle and it made me very miserable. I'm again actually in almost that very same situation... I won't go into details now but its something I'll maybe blog on in the near future. But it finally dawned on me that THIS time I have something I did not have in my teen years: my spirituality. Unfortunately I have not been utilizing this tool at its potential at all. I think its about time I started.
For some reason this time of year (mainly October - December) is a very spiritually connected time for me, but this year I've been totally missing out on it because I've been too busy wallowing. I'm attempting to wake up now, and don't want to go through this time (not only the holidays but the depression situation too) spiritually bankrupt. Ok... so I can't keep the house clean as fast as the Tornadoes mess it up. Or I can't keep a nice altar around. I have to remember that (though it feels like it) this way of life won't last forever. Besides, my connection to the God/esses and magick is all within. So I'm going to attempt to write here more frequently with some positive spiritual insights just to help myself get through this time. Like maybe this could be my little sanctuary, my home away from the
Body: I am still (believe it or not) trying to keep up with controlling my urges to eat. Miraculously I lost a pound (instead of gaining the couple I'd expected) over the Thanksgiving holidays. I'm on a mission to cut sodas totally again (though I have EPIC FAILED on that in the past) and so far I've gone what has been a surprisingly easy 6 days without.
My thought of the day to remember:
5 comments:
Depression sucks, especially during the darker months. I hope your spirituality helps you through everything.
Calling on your spirituality within is a wonderful idea. May Hecate guide you home from the underworld as she did Persephone.
@Diandra, thank you! It's funny because its usually the summer months that bring me down and the darker side of the wheel that brings me cheer. Which may be why it is unsettling for me to feel this way at this time of year.
@Debra... thank you for that awesomely beautiful sentiment, as these are two of my main patron Goddesses. :-)
I've struggled with depression most my entire life, so I know how difficult it is. I find that positive affirmations help... as well as getting out of the house and doing something. Writing helps too, so I think posting more regularly is a great idea. Also, lemon and mandarin orange essential oil are great pick-me-ups, carry or wear a rose quartz and/or amethyst, and walking is suppose to be great too but I'm too lazy LOL Hang in there, this too shall pass!
i am right there with you. my depression this season has been much worse than it usually is. i can't put my finger on why either.
we can lean on each other thru this tough time. you are loved and i can see you have a wonderful support system. hang in there!! you are going to make it because you are strong, intelligent and you want to make it1
((((hugs))))
Post a Comment